Welcome to the World

The Tsuchikage was in a foul mood long before her party reached Suna. She didn't mind the place normally, but after she'd spent so many days travelling in some stupid carriage that did little to keep the heat out, for the most part alone in that little cabin, she didn't want to do much else. Right now, those around her would be lucky if she didn't choke the next person she saw to death.

The five Kage of the lead hidden villages were meeting today, and the heavily pregnant Tsuchikage was ready to give them all a piece of her mind the moment she reached the meeting room. The door was opened roughly and a man dressed in loose, black clothing stepped half in, offering a hand. Her husband/bodyguard, still sporting a bruise from the last time they had encountered Kurotsuchi's father. (He had despised her choice in lover, and let's just say he was less than impressed to hear they were marrying because he had gotten her pregnant.) "We're here." He announced, unnecessarily. She knew they were there.

Taking his hand, she allowed him to help her out, fanning herself with her free hand. He stepped clear of her, suddenly wary as he took a fan from his pocket and took over the job of keeping her cool. She quickly flashed Kankurou an appreciative smile. The poor guy had had to bear the brunt of her bad mood for the past few months, and though he had great fingers for curing back ache and tried to keep his complaints to himself when she bossed him around, she had allowed herself to be especially foul to him. She'd even been spiteful enough to ensure that as long as she was struggling to sleep, he could stay awake as well. Letting her eyes linger over him, she took in his moody scowl, the bags under his eyes, the way he watched her like she was a ticking timebomb-although, considering all the facts, she essentially was-and felt a twinge of guilt in her chest.

"I hate the desert." She muttered, trying to start up 'friendly' conversation. His only response was a grunt. "Well, I don't hate it, not really. I loved coming here to see you. I just hate going places like this in such a worthless state..."
"Worthless?" Kankurou questioned, arching an eyebrow. "Believe me, you can still pack one hell of a punch." He gestured pointedly to his ribs with a smirk.
"I...I'm sorry." Kurotsuchi flashed a sheepish grin. "It was dark, I panicked."
"Sometimes I wonder if you really need guarding." He muttered with a chuckle.
"Hey, if all guards were as cute as you..." She let the sentence hang, craning her neck as the meeting point loomed. Great. Now she'd have to sit again, and just when walking around was starting to dispel those damn cramps she'd been having all morning. Maybe it was because she'd refused breakfast or something...

And all too soon she was crammed into a stuffy room with those four overly annoying men and their own guards. Honestly, she wasn't listening to the discussion any more. The heat was worse, and briefly she held her hand up to make Kankurou quit fanning her. It wasn't helping, just irritating her. The wind was biting at her neck and the pain in her gut was getting worse. She could feel the uncomfortable stare focussed on the back of her head. Her husband was concerned, but biting back any words. No right to interfere in the meeting. Instead, he tried to catch his little brother's eye, trying to convey the worry. She heard someone address her, asking her opinion on something, but she didn't look up. Her nails were digging into the tabletop.
"Kurotsuchi-sama." Kankurou muttered, reaching forward to rest a hand on her shoulder. It seemed to have an effect, because the moment he made contact, she let her head fall into her arms and groaned. A blissful beat of silence passed before both his hands were on her, heaving her upright as she heard someone, Chojuro she thought, call for a medic. "Are you okay?" Her husband asked cluelessly.
"Just dandy." She muttered after a moment, standing to leave. "Sorry for the interruption...I'm sure those of you with children understand, right?"
She didn't pause to gage the response, although there were a couple of nods while her husband hurried after her, paling considerably.

Soon, she was lying back on a medical bed, hands behind her head. Cracking open an eye, Kurotsuchi saw Kankurou lingering by the door. "Come in." She told him tiredly yet firmly, shooting him a glare. Heaving a sigh, he came to sit beside her. Best to keep the fact he'd been having nightmares about screaming kids a secret.
"This is really happening now?"
She got up, beginning to pace, pausing briefly to lean against the wall, whine and utter a string of curses. "Kankurou, it's been going on for hours, so shut up." She came over to him and he stood, letting her take his hand.
"'Tsuchi, that hurts!"
"How do you think it feels for me, you idiot?"
"Sorry, I-...ow! Cut it out!"
She grabbed his wrist then. "This is your own fault, you bastard! How could you do this to me?"
"Me? Hey, I never wanted children, remember."
"It's a little late to be spouting that kind of bullshit, you know." She let him go and he rubbed his wrist. There would be one hell of a bruise later. He watched her as she went back to pacing.
"You still can't complain. You wanted to keep it."
"And you wanted to marry me, so I don't think you have any real objections."
"Fine, just don't blame me because you have to squeeze out a baby."
She stormed back over to him, sinking her fist into his stomach. At least that made her feel better...
"This is your kid too, Kankurou. And you're an ass. Stop being an ass!"
"Jeez, calm your tits, woman." He managed through gritted teeth. This earned him another hit, but a softer one to the shoulder. Seeing she'd hurt him, she couldn't help but feel guilty. After a moment, she calmed down and sat back on the bed. With a sigh of relief, he went to the door.
"Where are you going?"
"Bathroom..."
"Don't leave..."
"I'll be back."
"Kankurou..."
"I'll be right back, I promise." Kurotsuchi's response was to roll over and sink her teeth into the pillow. He had to admit, he was happy that wasn't his arm, but at the same time, he didn't want to leave her alone. On the other hand, he was desperate. He would have to run, he decided.

Cheerfully, he was greeted with the threat that if he left her alone again, he'd be drinking all his meals through a straw. Scowling, he crossed his arms and sat beside her. She almost instantly latched onto his arm. "You're pissed off with me..."
"I'm not pissed off with you, 'Tsuchi."
"I don't mean to be a bitch..." She cut off with another groan, digging her nails into his skin. He ran a thumb over the back of her hand in an attempt to be comforting. "It hurts..."
"I know, I know..." He ran his fingers through her sweat-soaked hair. She really wasn't used to this heat. "It'll be over soon."
"It's taking too long..."
"Calm down."
"Oh, fuck..." She pulled away and started hitting the pillow. He heaved a tired sigh and drew one knee to his chest.
"That's not going to-"
"It helps! Shut up!"
He obeyed at once, almost afraid of another corkscrew to the gut. That last one had hurt.

The sun set, and rose again, and Kankurou obediently waited by his wife's side. Putting his needs on hold was undoubtedly better than being disembowelled by a furious kunoichi. It didn't help that she had made it clear that she didn't want other visitors until after the kid was born. The less people the better. It made Kankurou twice as uncomfortable. Surely it would be better if she had more people to support her? At least that way there would be less pain for him. He wanted to ask the others how they'd made it through this without being murdered. Then again, he couldn't imagine Matsuri, Hinata or Yakumo going as wild as this with just a few cramps.

He made sure to never voice this thought aloud.

Midday came and went. He needed a bathroom break again and a snack. He was supporting her, hands under her arms as hers essentially crushed his shoulder blades. He did his best to keep his full attention on her. He'd managed to refrain from all that 'almost over, you're doing well, soon we'll meet the baby' crap, because honestly, if he were the one going through that shit, he would probably punch someone spouting that in the face. It was safer to stay quiet, really.

This was the birth of his first child. It was stressful as hell, irritating, painful and-...and he shut his eyes, collapsing back into his chair as he heard the mewling cry of the newborn child. "Congratulations. He's a boy, and very healthy."
"He's beautiful..." He cracked open an eye curiously. "Kankurou, look!"
He leant over, looking at the child in her arms. "...Can I hold him?"
A shocked look crossed Kurotsuchi's face. "Sure." Slowly, she passed the infant over. "Here, make sure you support-"
"I know, I've held my nephew and niece before." The boy was fair with a little blue-black hair atop his head. He seemed determined to keep his eyes closed, and let out the odd gurgle and whimper as he cuddled up to his father's chest. Kankurou risked planting a kiss on his new son's forehead.
"So much for 'I'll never have children'." A voice commented from the doorway. He looked up to watch his little brother approach.
"Well, I...that is...it's...shut up."