John liked to go and see the strange horses when he could. He didn't like many animals. He didn't like slimy textures of toads, and the last owl he tried to stroke bit him, and cats always had people cooing over them because they were cute, too many people. He would also pet them too hard, or pet them in the wrong place, and they would get sad and run away, or scratch him. He was learning to get better at that with Riordan's cat, which was slowly starting to trust him.
The good thing about the strange horses was that people didn't crowd around them. They looked kind of lizard-like, which he didn't like when he first saw it, and bony. Skinny. They let him come over and pet them, and didn't get upset by how he did it. They made horrible noises sometimes, but that was it. Overall, the strange horses were nice.
It had become habit for him now to take some bacon from breakfast, or ham from lunch, and hide it in his school bag until he had a free hour or half hour to go and see the horses. They liked meat, he'd found, so he would bring them meat from the hall.
Normally, he would go alone to see the horses. Today, Eric followed him, even though it was raining. He'd seen him grab a wodge of ham, fold it neatly and put it away in his bag, after all. He had questions, and lots of them, many of which he asked as they trudged through the mud towards the forest.
"So why do you keep taking ham out here?"
"For the horses."
"...Horses don't eat meat, John."
"These ones do. They're magic horses."
"...You mean hippogriffs?"
"Less feathers."
Eric thought for a moment, then shook his head. "I don't know what you mean, mate."
"They pull the carriages at the beginning of the year."
"...The carriages pull themselves..."
"They pull the carriages." John insisted, winding his way through the trees. Eric dropped it, and followed quietly. Eventually, John stopped and laid the ham out.
They waited a few minutes. "Where are they?"
"They'll come for the ham if you're quiet."
So Eric crossed his arms and tried to find cover beneath one of the trees, waiting quietly until John called him.
"There! A big one. See it?"
There was nothing there, as far as the blond could tell. "No."
"Some people can't see them. I don't know why. Maybe we can ask Hagrid about them." From Eric's point of view, ham disappeared from the floor as John patted the air. From John's point of view, he was petting a thestral as it ate some ham.
"So how come you can see them and I can't?"
"I don't know. I said I don't know."
"Can Riordan see them?"
"I don't know."
"Can Penny see them?"
"I don't know."
A third voice cut through to them before Eric could ask another question. "Honestly, you two, what have I told you about hanging around out here during storms?" It was Violetta, another friend of theirs. John bet that Eric was about to ask if she could see the horses. He barely spared her a glance.
"You'll get cold and sick out here in the rain." He recited, still focusing on the horses. "Go inside and warm up. We can have hot chocolate."
"Sometimes, it feels like you and Penny are our mums." Eric muttered.
"I like seeing the horses." John explained. "They don't mind the rain. I don't mind the rain."
Violetta looked directly at them and smiled, coming forward to pet the same one John was. "You mean the thestrals? Yeah, they're pretty cool, huh? A lot of people who can see them don't like them. They're associated with bad omens, which is bullshit, and people think they're creepy. They're really sweet and affectionate though. Wild ones and trained ones. The ones in the forest are trained, I think."
"They don't bite, like the owls do. I have a scar on my finger from the owls."
Eric huffed. "How come you can both see them and I can't?"
Violetta was looking at the scar on John's finger as she explained. "They can only be seen by people who have seen and come to terms with death, that's what I've been told."
"Oh...well, John boasts that he stabbed someone once, so that explains that..."
"That guy was worse than the owls." John agreed with a nod. He then pointed back to the Thestral. "I call this one Mister Bones. I don't know if he actually is a mister. I don't know how to tell short of looking between the legs, and that's rude."
"I thought you liked being rude to people."
"Yes, people. Not to horses, though. The horses have never done anything wrong."
"Fair enough."
John stopped petting the thestral and spoke to Violetta. "You saw death?"
"Once. When I was little..."
John chose not to pry. It was rude, and Violetta was one of his best friends. "I've seen it a few times. People would get hurt or get cold and not make it. Then I came here and saw the horses and I didn't care any more. I like normal horses, too, but I don't see them nearly as much as I get to see these ones." They were quiet for a moment, and then he said "I was little too. Old enough to understand, but still young. And stupid. When I first saw someone die, I thought I was with a family I'd be with for the rest of my life. I was six, I think, and all the other families had decided they didn't want me. Fostering, they said it was, I wasn't technically adopted, not even with this couple, and it was always really upsetting when I went back and forth between houses, I didn't like it. The dad that time died suddenly. The mum was out somewhere, and the dad choked on lunch and died in front of me. I think the mum blamed me. Most people, I tell them the first person I saw die was my real dad, and he deserved to die, but it was the dad I had when I was six. He was nice. He used to carry me on his shoulders and put my name into songs."
"Oh, John, I'm so sorry." For a moment, Violetta reached out to touch his shoulder in a comforting gesture, but read his body language and pulled back at the last minute. He didn't like unexpected touches, after all. He gave Mister Bones a few more pets, then turned on his heel and began to walk away.
"I need to go to the toilet." He announced. "I'm coming back afterwards, though."
"What about charms class?" Asked Eric.
"Fuck charms class."
"Huh."
Once John was out of sight, Eric approached Violetta. "He really likes you, you know."
"Yeah, I'd hope so. We're good friends, at the very least."
"Yeah, but he likes you more than Riordan or Penny. He shares with you without being asked. I think the only person he likes more than you is me."
"Uh huh, sure."
"I mean, it's impossible to like anyone more than me."
"Yep. You're really full of yourself, Eric."
"I know. You love me anyway." He bumped shoulders with her, then sighed. "John once told me 'I can't stand blond people, but I'll make an exception for you', and from him, that's a huge compliment. That's the day we became best friends. I think I'm gonna embellish it in future, make it sound cooler. Include pirates, maybe."
Violetta nodded. "Stuff it with pirates. John will always tell the real version, but you can make it wilder every time."
"Definitely. He's honest to a fault, that boy." Eric gazed to the empty space where he thought the thestrals were, and felt an uncomfortable feeling in his chest. A tight ball of sickness. He couldn't see these death horses now, and now he knew they were seen only when one had witnessed death, he wasn't sure he wanted to. If anyone around him was going to die, it would be his sister with her awful habits and self-abusive behaviours, and he didn't want to watch her go, then be reminded of that every time he saw a horse. With a shudder, he shifted closer to Violetta, using the cold and the rain as an excuse, never willing to admit he needed comfort.
((This started off as just Eric, John and Vi bonding near thestrals and then part of it turned into 'hey, remember how John's life sucks?', then turned into 'Eric has death-related anxiety'. Violetta does not belong to me.))
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